Mark 10:32-45 25/04/6 Osaka Orthodox Church
In the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit
As Jesus walked ahead of the disciples toward Jerusalem, the disciples were confused, sensing something unusual about him. However, they were too scared to ask. Seeing them like that, the Lord told them that he would be arrested by the priests and teachers of the law, sentenced to death, handed over to the Romans, mocked, scourged, and killed, and that he would rise on the third day.
But the disciples did not understand. They misunderstood the prediction of the Lord’s suffering and resurrection. They thought that the Lord would break the rule of Rome and become the new king and be glorified.
That is why their interest immediately shifted to who would be the closest aide to the “new king,” Jesus. James and John got close to the Lord and asked to be his aides on either side. Hearing this, the other disciples harshly rebuked them, and with bloodshot eyes insisted, “It will be me!”
Why is this pitiful incident being read on this Sunday, just one week before Palm Sunday? As the Lord admonished the disciples, who were on the verge of fighting over who was the greatest, this passage reminds us that what we should be learning during Great Lent through prayer and fasting is not to be like the rulers of this world, but to embrace what the Lord said: “whoever wants to be great among you must be your servant… and whoever wants to be first shall be a slave of all.” (Mark 10:43, 44).
The twelve disciples — There were other followers of Jesus, but the “twelve” were the ones who served him closest, were taught by him closely, and followed him faithfully. They are the ones who have been looked up to as shining examples by those who want to follow the Lord. Their shameful state actually overlaps with our own state, which has been to observe fasting, pray frequently, and seriously strive to practice the “love” taught by the Lord. Many times a day, we prostrated ourselves and prayed the Prayer of St. Ephraim. But did we truly seek the lofty heights that this prayer calls for, the heights that God originally bestowed upon man? Could we cast off self-pity, competitiveness and pride? Could we refrain from even one noisy and vain conversation? Could we truly lament our own sins without judging others? And above all, were we able to love others?
Instead, our hearts are filled with uncontrollable passions that assert themselves, like the disciples who fought each other even as the Lord’s suffering was right in front of them. On the other hand, if we were able to “succeed,” our hearts would swell with even more wicked pride at having “succeeded.”
We can only lament.
But in the end, it was in this honest lament that we may complete our fast.
We were powerless. We had accomplished nothing. In the end, we were unable to become people worthy of the splendor of Pascha. We could not acquire the slightest bit of worthiness to join the banquet of the Kingdom of God.
…With Holy Week right around the corner, we finally realized that by being too proud to bear our own crosses, we ended up merely leaning back on the cross that Christ Himself was carrying, and adding that burden to the Lord’s shoulders. Now we have no choice but to entrust ourselves to the salvation of Christ’s cross, to His free forgiveness.
The Lord no longer blames us for anything. He no longer asks for anything. While embracing the natural and very human trembling of the Son of Man at the approaching suffering of the cross, He looks at each and every one of us and says, “Enough, I will carry the cross.”
That is why Jesus said this immediately after scolding his disciples:
“For the Son of Man came not to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many” (Mark 10:45).
All we have to do now is to receive the love of Christ Jesus, God who became man and suffered for us. All we have to do is to cling to that love and receive the Lord’s body and blood as the undeniable reality of that love.
Today we remember “Mary of Egypt.” This shameful prostitute tried to step into the church out of mere curiosity, but was pushed back by a mysterious force and was unable to cross the threshold. She was heartbroken as she realized her own sinfulness. All we can do is pray that the hot tears that suddenly filled her eyes may also fill our eyes as we gaze upon the suffering of the Lord.